


Starlight In Your Hair

by centreoftheselights



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Dropping Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Exhaustion, Fluff, Graduate School, Hair Dyeing, Insecurity, M/M, Other, Overworking, Pet Names, Queerplatonic Relationships, Quitting Grad School, Remy kinda has a southern accent and it's all Vi's fault, gray hairs, reassurance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:12:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21512818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/centreoftheselights/pseuds/centreoftheselights
Summary: Logan finds a grey hair. Remy canneverknow. (He already knows.)
Relationships: Logic | Logan Sanders & Sleep | Remy Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Queerplatonic Losleep
Comments: 44
Kudos: 229





	Starlight In Your Hair

**Author's Note:**

> Self-care is starting to write a self-projection fic and then getting derailed by projecting your friend's issues instead.
> 
> (I know I haven't updated much lately, but I've been busy writing a Secret Santa fic! It's mostly done now so I should be posting a little more.)

Logan peers at his reflection in the mirror. With a frown, his eyes sweep over all his imperfections – the dark rings under his eyes, far more prominent with his glasses off, a cluster of pimples on his chin threatening to turn into a full break-out, and – oh goodness, what's that in his hair?

He combs his fingers through the strands, hunting for the flash of white he glimpsed amidst his black, straight locks. He's expecting to find a fleck of dandruff, or perhaps another streak of toothpaste whose location is due to some improbable magic of his own clumsiness.

But instead his fingers locate the strand, rubbing along it and – nothing. It's a perfectly ordinary strand of hair.

Which is as unforgivingly white as a blank word document.

Wait.

Logan curses softly, checking again and – no, there are more, he soon finds a second, then a third. His hair is thick, it hides them well, but under a close eye the truth is undeniable.

Logan's hair is going grey.

How is this possible? He's only twenty-four! Of course, admittedly grad school has been stressful and he hasn't found a lot of time lately to eat or sleep or socialise or really do anything except write papers and have existential crises –

Okay, yes, it's possible he's been under some level of stress. But –

Logan bites his lip. His mind goes, as is its habit, to Remy. His polar opposite, his best friend, his second self. Irrepressible, irresponsible Remy, who always knows the latest trends and walks down every street like he owns it. Remy who is the life of every party and still up with the sun for morning yoga. Remy who has endless energy, effortless beauty, who exudes youthful vigour with everything he does –

Logan swallows, hard. Remy can never, ever know about this.

***

Logan finds the hair dye easily enough.

He'd considered asking Virgil – but no, too many questions. His hair is already black, why would he want to dye it, unless…

Well, it's simply easier if no-one knows.

The instructions on the box are easy to follow, and as he inspects the results in the mirror, he is satisfied. The colour is perhaps minutely different, but he doubts that any of his compatriots are likely to notice the change. And more importantly, the white hairs are gone, completely indistinguishable among the wave of “Midnight Sky”.

His hair is still damp when Remy sashays into his bedroom.

“Hey gurl, how are – wait.” He looks Logan up and down. “You look different. What's new here?”

“Uh…” Logan bites his lip. “I don't believe you've seen me wear this necktie before? It was a present from Patton.”

Remy nods, although he still looks suspicious.

“Patty-cake got you an item of clothing without a pun on it? No wonder I'm getting weird vibes.” Remy grins. “How's the studying going? You still on for movies tonight?”

Logan hesitates. Dying his hair had been an unexpected delay, and he has a lot of work to do… but he misses Remy. Even though they share an apartment, it's been _weeks_ since he last had a night alone with his qpp.

“Perhaps we can start at eight?” he suggests as a compromise. “I should really finish annotating this article…”

Remy gives him a look for a moment, like he might say something – but he doesn't.

“Sure thing, sugar. I'm making Thai for dinner, that okay?” Logan nods, and Remy breezes out again, leaving the room feeling painfully quiet.

***

By eight o'clock, Logan's brain feels as though it has been steamed, mashed and fried. Try as he might, the words on the page are blurring in front of his eyes, and he can't seem to make them resolve into meaningful sentences. When Remy pulls the papers gently out of his hands, Logan makes no move to resist.

“Babes,” Remy says, “your brain needs fuel to work, and rest to recharge. Come on, time for food and cuddles and bad sci-fi movies.”

Logan stumbles a little as he walks, and Remy's hand is there on the small of his back. Always ready to catch him before he even has a chance to fall.

The curry is delicious, but Logan can hardly taste it. He only eats half a plate, but Remy simply carries the leftovers with them as they go to settle on the sofa.

When Logan sits beside him, Remy chuckles.

“Well, now that won't do.” He pulls Logan sideways, so he's lying with his head pillowed in the soft curve of Remy's lap. “That better, sugar?”

“I…” Logan feels like he should protest his dignity, but he can't deny that the warmth and comfort of lying on top of Remy is nice. “… yeah.”

“Yeah, I bet it is.”

Remy cards his fingers through Logan's hair, making no move yet to turn on the DVD player.

Then he pauses, his hand going still.

“Hey, darlin'?” he says softly. “What happened to my starlight?”

“What?” Logan is too tired to understand.

“Your hair,” Remy explains. “D'you dye it or something? Your little starlight kisses have all gone away.”

Logan stiffens, sitting up abruptly.

“I –” He flushes. “Sorry, I didn't know you'd noticed them.”

“I notice everything about you, honey. But why are you saying sorry?”

“You don't – I shouldn't –”

Remy cups a hand over Logan's face, tilting his chin up gently when he tries to look down.

“Oh, babes. Are you shy about it?”

Logan's answering flush says more than enough.

“I don't mind you dying your hair if you wanna, but you don't need to cover up on my account. Your hair is beautiful with its starlight kisses.”

“You don't have to call it that – I'm going grey in my twenties, it's hardly _romantic_ –”

“Well, we ain't romantic either,” Remy jokes. “And I don't know, a speck of white in among all that inky darkness, what was I meant to call it?”

“A sign of premature ageing?”

“A sign of hard work,” Remy fired back. “You're right, they aren't kisses – they're battle scars. I know you've been fighting so hard, babe…”

“I…” Logan slumps suddenly, burying his face in his arms. “I hinkay rannoo git.”

“What was that, sugar?”

Logan turns his head so his mouth is free.

“I think I want to quit.”

“Okay babydoll, sure thing.”

Logan looks up.

“Did you hear me correctly? I said I was going to quit my Ph.D.!”

“Yeah, you sure did.”

“So…” Logan frowns at him. “So yell at me! Tell me I'm weak for wanting to quit, that I just need to try harder! Tell me I'm throwing away everything I've worked for by stopping before the finish line, that I'm making a waste of every sleepless night and missed date and –”

“And grey hair?” Remy asks, lowering his sunglasses to look Logan in the eye. “Oh, honey. I'm not gonna get on your case over this. It's your decision – and honestly, I've been worried about you. How you've been living ain't doing anyone any good.”

“So you agree with me?” Logan blinked, not able to process what he was hearing.

“I love you,” Remy said. “And I support your decision, and I will help you in any way I can. Yes darlin', I think you're in the right here.”

“And you don't think…” Logan's voice was barely a whisper. “You don't think I'm stupid for waiting so long? For letting it get so bad, for wasting so much time –?”

“Not a waste,” Remy cut him off. “The last few years might not have got you a fancy certificate, but they have made you into the man you are today. And I love that man – starlight and all.”

Logan didn't speak. He didn't think he'd be able to, even if he had the words. He just buried his face into Remy's chest, and held on as tight as he could.

“I've got you, gurl,” Remy murmured. “Always. Even though you're about to make me watch Big Hero 6 for the eighty-five-millionth time –”

“We don't have to – I know you wanted to watch –”

“Nah,” Remy says. “It's a Pixar kinda night. And since I'm feeling generous, I'll even be the big spoon when we squish together in your tiny bed tonight –”

“I love you,” Logan gasps. “Remy, I – I don't know what I'd do without you.”

Remy chuckles softly.

“Well then, sugar,” he says. “It's a good thing you won't ever have to find out.”


End file.
